For years, behind this plaster mask, I hid,
But I finally took it off, for it forbid
me to live as me, I hid, I lived a lie,
For now, I see the real “I”.
My flaws and imperfections,
Were once a source of rejection,
But now they’re part of who I am,
And I embrace them because I can.
I used to wear this plaster mask,
To hide the child behind the task,
Of pleasing others, losing me,
But now I’m free, I’m finally free.
No more hiding, no more lies,
No more trying to compromise,
For I am who I’m meant to be,
And that’s the only thing that’s key.
So look at me, what do you see?
I hope you see the real me,
The one that’s been there all along,
But was hidden by the plaster strong.
Now I stand before you, I am bold,
No longer scared, no longer cold,
For I have found my truest self,
And put the plaster mask on the shelf.

Recycled Poetry is a constraint technique I invented, as this is after all a Workshop of Potential Literature. Recycled poetry takes an old poem written by the author (me) and rewrites it, sometimes choosing one form to be in rhyme and another not in rhyme, or maybe using lots of different rhyme forms. Maybe it is revisiting an old poem to add a deeper layer, or a different perspective or voice.

The poem recycled for the one above I wrote 20 years ago. When I was 30, now I am 50.

Plaster eyes don’t cry: Age 30

Here I hide behind this plaster mask
for fear of what you see.
I can no longer hide for the plaster is broken
showing through to the real me.
Once perfect in its deception
this false self even I believed.
I believed until challenged by a passerby.
Then the plaster cracked and I questioned,
“Who has been deceived?”
Our foundation was shaken.
Unsure of the truth and seeing a lie in front of me,
I tore this mask from my face in fear
and frustration. Now who was I to be?
I felt free.
The plaster mask lay in pieces on the floor.
Plaster eyes don’t cry but now I could cry.
I searched my mind seeking the time
the plaster mask was poured.
I questioned “Why?”
I remembered a child hiding
behind a plaster mask,
One that was discarded before our time.
That mask was made from a different cast
torn from this faceless child
also in pieces on the floor.
Plaster eyes don’t cry.
The child cried.
I searched my mind, for that was before.
Then came you.
To this faceless child a shining star.
You I loved. You looked at me. What did you see?
You saw all my imperfections. Then I knew fear.
To hide these flaws from your eyes
I cried a final tear. Plaster eyes don’t cry.
I poured this mask and shaped it to be
everything I thought you demanded of me.
Until even I believed.
I believed this mask to be me.
Who has been deceived?
The child that was before,
that faceless child that was me.
By my Mother and my Father,
that mask was poured. They that I loved.
They shaped it to be
everything they demanded of me to be.
Behind that mask, I tried to hide
until it cracked and the cracks showed through.
They saw the imperfections when I cried.
In their anger, my fear grew.
Plaster eyes don’t cry.
From the face of that child, the plaster flew
and crashed to pieces on the floor.
She felt free, that child that was me.
Now who was I to be?
Then I met you and You I loved.
You looked at me. What did you see?
Did you see the faceless child? Did you see me?
Did you see all my imperfections?
I knew fear.
I poured this mask that I believed
you wanted to see. Who has been deceived?
Once perfect in its deception
this false self is now in pieces on the floor.
I felt free. Now who was I to be? Alone?
Apart from you, I looked at me.
Without my plaster mask, what did I see?
I saw all my hopes and dreams.
No longer the faceless child, I saw me.
I searched my mind because that was then.
Then here you were again and I shed a tear.
To mask these dreams of me being me
I picked up the pieces from the floor.
For it was my fear that if I cried
I would know the anger that I knew before.
I pasted them together and tried to hide.
No.
I can hide no more.
The cracks show through. I look at me.
What do I see? I see a faceless child. I see me.
I see all my flaws and imperfections,
all my hopes and dreams.
I like what I see behind the mask. I like me.
Now you, look at me. What do you see?
See all of me because I am to be me.