My Momma’s pain was the only world she knew,

Her life was a blur, her views were askew,

Though it was not my pain, her pain I knew.

My Momma’s pain was a heavy load to bear,

I wept for my Momma, but it was a hidden token,

as I yearned for a bond, for a love that was unspoken.

No hand to hold, no hug nor kiss goodnight, a child broken.

She held her pride high, and reminded, life isn’t fair.

Spare no Laughter, shed no tear, composure maintain,

Keep your love hidden, rules she never did explain.

Speak only to the mirror, shackle your secrets with a chain.

My life was a haze, as a dense fog filled the air.

I wept for my Momma, in the quiet of the night,

I longed for her to see me, hear me and shine love’s light,

I followed the rules, I lied for her, to make things right,

But she never saw, never heard, she couldn’t care.

Pride she held tight like a shield to maintain,

Her rules like a mystery were hard to explain.

Don’t complain, just maintain, ignore the pain.

Head down, look them in the eye but don’t stare.

I wept for my Momma, but her heart I couldn’t reach.

I longed to escape the hurt, but her pride I couldn’t breach.

I tried to break the silence but I found I had no speech.

My words I wrote down in hopes to declare,

To heal to grow, that our love, together might bloom,

beyond the pain, beyond the darkness and the gloom,

instead, anger filled the air, and left me no room.

Run away, all that I could do, all that I dare.

I wept for my Momma, but her pain a shadowed guise,

Run from this tumult, shun the past, where sorrow lies.

My only hope in fleeing, hence, I fled with resolute cries,

Away, Away, I found my voice I found, my pain laid bare.

Still I love my Momma, love remains my heart’s refrain

Still I weep for Momma, in my prayers I say her name,

But I won’t hide, won’t lie, will laugh, will cry, sanity retain.

Will write, will speak, will love, will seek truth to share.