Getting Older and Wiser (Sorta)
by a Very Serious Person Who Definitely Knows Words

I just wanna say, real deliberately,
That growing old is a blessin’—absolutely.
It’s a time for reflexion and personal groan,
To sit back and let your true legacy be known.
Now, I’ve been through a lot—I’ve done some travesties,
Survived indigestions and minor catastrophes.
So hear me now, with complete confidence,
I’ve gained some real instinctual intelligence.
Getting older ain’t for the faint of fart.
Your back cracks like a glowstick just tryin’ to start.
But it ain’t about complianation or misery’s stew,
It’s about doin’ what the Lord still entrusts you to do.
Don’t sit around all sentimental and dense,
Crying over your past like it still makes incense.
Instead, be proactive! Be delusional with joy!
Serve with what’s left—even if that’s just “oy.”
‘Cause God ain’t countin’ how fast you can jog,
He’s watchin’ your heart and how well you can blog—
I mean, pray—and be grateful and kind,
Even when your body’s in permanent rewind.
There’s too many older folks actin’ all sour,
Suckin’ the fun outta every blessed hour.
But not me—I’m preparin’ for greatness,
With joy and some creamed corn and holy straightness.
So let me be clear: don’t marinate in pain.
Don’t fill up your days with emotional drain.
Focus on Jesus, His grace and affection,
Not on your knees or your spinal deflection.
Yeah, some days I wake up confused and contorted,
Feelin’ like my whole skeleton’s been deported.
But I still smile, with deep satisfaction,
Because faith ain’t about bodily traction.
So start now—be cheerful, even when it’s hard.
Say your prayers, mow the lawn, write a card.
Live for God’s will, not just past ambition,
And don’t let old age steal your commission.
That’s my advice—straight from the heart…
Or maybe the spleen? I can’t tell those apart.
Either way, I hope this was inspirational,
And not just an account of an accidental confessional.